Tag Archives: Antidepressant

Life Without the Placebos

Followers of this blog will recall reading about my decision about 10 weeks ago to completely abandon the mood stabilizer and the anti depressant I had been taking for several years. The people in my care team, including my psychiatrist, my nurse practitioner and my immediate family were aghast at my decision. They remembered a lot of the problem that had arisen in the past after I abandoned the safety net provided by chemicals. Nonetheless, I stuck to my rights and to  me it has been the best decision I ever made.

Is this something that everyone could do? Probably not. For one thing I have a a lot of coping strategies. I’m highly educated, work experience in several fields, access to resources in person and over the Internet, a pet and a lot of self-understanding. I have people in the programs where I work who complain about their medications and the length of time they have been taking them. However as soon as they remove these medications from their symptoms they begin to deteriorate. To a certain extent their bodies have been trained to look for these medications and their minds keep asking, where’s the stuff?

Even the most ardent mental health advocates usually  recommend a gradual approach to weaning yourself off medications. This process involves finding other strategies, such as one might develop using a wellness recovery action plan. I developed my plan several years ago and I have helped others. These plans cover many different areas such as exercise, coping with environmental triggers, friendship, employment and romance.

When I moved into a clean and safe duplex recently it was a direct result of the success of my wellness plan. My mind responded positively, too, saying, “I like that, give me some more.”  In other words, now that I have a nice place, how about some company? I worked with a woman over the weekend who I have been dying to get to know for more than a year. As it happened, she moved recently and lives about ten blocks away from me. Walking distance, another one of the coping strategies.

I got a dvd player last week and hooked it up to my big screen television. I bought some dvds, watched one of them at home and decided I should bring it to work. My Internet provider ATT forced me into their rebranded service Uverse which sounds like something that the Unitarian Universalists would have created. It’s a little faster than my old service and works better with my blog. And the aforementioned pet, my little cat, has more room to roam around without getting underfoot. That was one of my pet peeves, pun intended, at my old place.

So you can just imagine with all of these things going on, how would ever have time to become depressed? So my advice, for those who want to replace those little placebos, is to get a life. Really, you’ll be glad you did.

I am officially non-compliant

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Today I met with my psychiatrist for the first time since I stopped taking the anti-depressant and the mood stabilizer he had prescribed for me. In a radical break for freedom I decided that the blah listless feelings I was experiencing meant that the medications were not working. I wrote about my experiences on this blog, including my discovery of the food supplement SAMe. My family and my supervisor at work were skeptical but gradually they have accepted the changes I have made.

Now it will be up to the mental health professionals who are part of my care team to understand that the person they knew as a patient has begun taking charge of his own recovery. I encourage my peers to become much more active in advocating for themselves instead of following instructions like sheep. Is it really working, how does it make you feel and what is your quality of life are the kinds of questions I tell people they need to ask.

As a safety precaution I told the psychiatrist that if I felt uncomfortable symptoms re-appearing I would consider taking the medications once more. I think that if the case managers I see every day realized that the pleasant and helpful peer specialiast with whom they just conversed was a radical in taking charge of his life, they would be scandalized. I hope one day that they will be pleased.

Choices, for one and all.

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